Corporate Hard Truths: Why Hard Work Isn’t Enough with Roxy Couse


Roxy Couse has built a platform by saying the quiet parts of corporate life out loud.
The career lies. The unspoken rules. The bad bosses. The pressure to be "authentic" at work while still somehow being polished, agreeable, visible, strategic, collaborative, ambitious, and not "too much." Cute little list, right?
In this episode of Loud & Lifted, Roxy brings her signature mix of corporate hard truths, workplace humor, and practical career strategy to a conversation about what it really takes to get ahead — without losing yourself in the process.
Her message is clear: hard work alone will not save your career.
We talk about why performance doesn't automatically lead to promotion, why visibility matters more than most women want to admit, and why personal branding isn't just an online thing — it's how people understand your value before you're even in the room. Roxy gets into the hard truth about bad bosses, why you can't outwork one, workplace mean girls, career ownership, and why "no one is coming to save you" isn't harsh — it's freeing.
And in the back half, it gets personal: Roxy shares how she built her own business on the side of a corporate job, the 3 a.m. note she wrote giving herself six months to get out, and what it took to actually bet on herself. It's the rare career conversation that names the hard stuff honestly — and still ends somewhere hopeful.
This one's for the overachievers, people-pleasers, eldest daughters, and high-performing women who have done everything "right" and are still wondering why they feel stuck.
You'll learn
- Why hard work often gets you more work — not more opportunity
- The real cost of being invisible in your career
- How to build visibility without feeling fake
- Why speaking to your impact isn't bragging — and who's actually in the room when it counts
- Why you can't outwork a bad boss — and what staying too long really costs
- How personal branding becomes career protection
- How to start building something of your own — before you're ready
Roxy's hard truth: your career is personal. And if you don't take ownership of it, someone else will decide what happens next.
Links
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Welcome to Loud and Lifted. I'm your host, Betsy
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Ham. Today, I'm talking with Roxy Kaus, a former
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Fortune 500 corporate leader turned creator,
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career voice, and founder who talks about work
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in a way that more people need to hear it. Honest,
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practical, and with zero corporate fluff. Roxy
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has built a huge platform on social by saying
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the quiet parts out loud, like the fact that
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hard work alone does not get you promoted. And
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in her words, sometimes it just gets you more
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work. In this conversation, we get into all of
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the hard truths, visibility, personal branding,
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bad bosses, why your manager's reputation matters,
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and how to stop waiting for someone else to magically
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notice your potential. We also talk about what
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it really means to build something on your own
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and why creating options for yourself might be
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the biggest life upgrade of all. Welcome to loud
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and lifted Roxy. Thank you so much for being
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here. Thank you for having me. So you talk a
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lot about careers, personal branding, boundaries
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to a few thousand people on social media, like
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pretty amazing gig. But you have a corporate
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experience to back up what you talk about. And
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now you're also building your own thing. So we're
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going to talk about some really interesting perspectives
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that you have today. And we're going to start
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somewhere uncomfortable. You talk a lot about
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and hard truths. So let's get into it. What are
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some of the, what's the biggest hard truth you
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think that women have been told or sold from
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a corporate perspective? Yeah, I think there's,
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I think there's so many. One of the first ones
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that I ever talked about on social media was
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around that performance alone will not get you
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promoted. And I, I think it being an eldest daughter,
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a millennial, I always thought that, you know,
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I kept my head down. I did my job. Eventually
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I was going to rise to the top. I did not. I
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was taking so many lateral moves and it just,
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I just didn't understand why. And, um, one of
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the things I always talk about, it's like hard
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work gets you more work and and when you're invisible,
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no one is going to be speaking your name in rooms
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that you're not in. And so there's, there's just
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like, these methods and these things that I've
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learned the hard way that I talk about through
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my content today. And how far were you in your
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career when you came to this realization? So
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far in my career, my first job I had, I remember
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I was, every time a role came open, I was like,
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oh, I'm gonna apply because I was hard, I was
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very hard working, new process. I'm like, I can
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do it. I would take it, I would own it. I would
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be the, I would set the standard of like how
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we actually get. things done, but every time
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a new job would come open, it wouldn't go to
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me. And finally, people started quitting. And
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every time somebody would quit, they would give
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it to someone else. They'd find someone else.
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And finally, they were like, Roxy, we're going
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to give this job to you. And I was grateful,
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but also it just kind of left the sour taste
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in my mouth. And so I was probably about five,
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six years into my career before I realized, oh,
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wait, this hard work doesn't... helped me get
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promoted. And I also had this realization that
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in order to promote myself, I had to keep leaving
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companies. Like I had to keep promoting myself
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out of companies. And that gets exhausting. Like
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maybe I want to stay where I'm at. So if you
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do want to stay where you're at, you do have
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to figure out like, how do I thrive in these
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spaces? Like what, what is going to help me to
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get to where I'm trying to go? So what is the
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answer to that? Yeah, so one, it's visibility.
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I talk about on social media this. the cost of
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being invisible is too high. And I'm an introvert.
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A lot of people don't know that about me, but
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I'm an introvert. I used to, I was telling someone
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that I was in this role and I had taken these
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several lateral moves. I sat right by the bathroom.
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So it was like a lot of foot traffic. I never
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spoke to anyone. People would pass. Like there
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was this opportunity for me to just be like,
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hey, cause when you're an introvert or like you're
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just not necessarily comfortable with Small talk,
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one of the best ways to do it is to, it's one
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-on -one interactions. Maybe you don't feel comfortable
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talking in a meeting, but if you can catch somebody
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one -on -one, and I realized that was my superpower,
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just one -on -one conversations. But in that,
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in that particular role, I never talked to anyone.
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And so when it came to review time and they're
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like, yes, Roxy did do a great job, but we're
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not giving her a higher rating because we don't
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think that like she necessarily deserves it.
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We don't even know who this is. Those are the
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things. You have to figure out how to be strategically
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visible in corporate spaces. I teach a lot about
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personal branding. We can't afford to not elevate
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or invest in our personal brand. That's one part
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of it is being more visible inside of corporate
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rooms and outside. You bring up a great point
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because we talk about visibility, exposure a
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lot. Pi is one of my favorites, which I saw you
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did some content on that not that long ago. But
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to your point, it's not about being introverted.
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You just have to figure out where you're comfortable
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and that one -on -one piece. Sometimes I hear,
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well, I don't know how to start. I don't know
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how to start the conversation. Do you have any
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advice on somebody who wasn't super extroverted
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to how you started to engage with people at work?
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Yeah, I think it starts with a simple like, hey,
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hi, how are you? One of the one one thing that
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happens and actually, I'm a person that I'm going
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to find a work bestie at work, but I have to
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do that by it's like slowly integrating myself
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into getting to know this person. Like I initially
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I don't want to know about your weekend plans.
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I'm just that person. I don't want to know about
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your weekend plans. I I'm very much about the
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work, but If I can start to integrate myself
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in the conversation, like, hey, how are you doing?
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And then eventually doing that, you start to
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learn more about people and how they think. Corporate
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people are some of the funniest people I've ever
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met, but for the longest time in my career. Nobody
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was being funny. That's why part of my content
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is like, it's humor. Like guys, like it's not
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that serious. And I just love when I find out
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these little tidbits about people and it can
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be overwhelming at first if somebody like over
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shares. I'm like, oh wait, I wasn't ready to
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know this. Once we start to have these conversations,
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these one -on -one conversations, I learn more
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about you. That really helps me. And I think
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that that is so important. I think a lot of people
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think that when it comes to networking, we think
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we have to go to these huge networking events.
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And we need to go to these happy hours and talk
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to everybody in the room. And that's literally
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not how it happens. It just is. these very intimate
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one -on -one conversations, getting to know someone.
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And eventually you just start to build this network
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of people who know who you are and you know who
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they are and how you can support each other.
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And I think that that's the best way to go about
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even being just being more visible. Absolutely.
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And so for somebody starting out with this, how
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do they come across or not feel fake, right?
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Like sometimes I've heard that, oh, that's not
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who I am. It's not how I'm comfortable. So how
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do we make sure we're not being fake when we
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start doing this? I think that there is, we all
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play a role, honestly. I think no one is. their
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most authentic self at work, honestly. I just
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feel like that's just the reality of what it
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is. Who I am in my house when every other word
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is a cuss word. No, I'm not showing up at work
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that way. I wouldn't have a job. So I do think
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that there is a, we do have a professional hat
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and we have who we are outside of work. And you
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don't have to marry these two people together.
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being like myself, like I'm a homebody. If I
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saw someone at work at the grocery store outside
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of work, I'm probably gonna hide. Like, I don't
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want to talk to you. But at work, that's different
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because I know that in order to achieve my goals,
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I need to be more collaborative. I need to interact
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with people. It's just, that's the cost of trying
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to get where you're trying to go. It's like...
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leaning in a little bit, and I don't think that
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there's anything authentic or inauthentic about
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doing that. Like, you literally have this North
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Star, this goal, and you can't just be sitting
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in your cubicle and not getting to know people
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or interacting or being in these meetings, and
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you have this thought and not sharing. But at
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the end of the day, you're expecting to grow
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your career, get promoted. have more beam on
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more vis high visibility projects. It's just
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like, that's just the cost of doing business.
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Like we all have to lean in a little. That's
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a great way of putting it. And it's funny because
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I was thinking of it's part of playing the game
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and I struggle with that concept, right? Because
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it's a game. Well, kind of like there's winners
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and there's losers, right? So, you know, that's
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that to me, that's just. It's part of playing
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the game, whether that's the best way to use
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it. That's just the reality of, especially in
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bigger corporate organizations. And again, you've
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been fortune 500 companies. So you've been there,
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you've done that, you know, you know, the rules,
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the unspoken rules. Yeah, exactly. I definitely
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think it is a part of playing the game. And honestly,
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I don't think that there's any winners or losers
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in, in, in the game, but it is, um, you, and
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I think a part of playing the game is actually
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knowing that the game exists, and there is a
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game that you are playing. So just even being
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aware of the fact that, okay, being the hardest
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worker does not guarantee that I'm going to get
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the exposure that I want, or I'm going to get
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promoted at the end of the day. That is a part,
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just being aware that the game exists is also
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a part of just playing the game. Very true. That's
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very true. So you talked about the building the
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relationship piece, which I agree is totally
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important. and that helps with the visibility
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but how do you suggest sort of giving yourself
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like putting your own horn giving yourself credit
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like putting that visibility of building like
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hey I'm doing this great work I hear women say
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like I feel like I'm bragging it was a team effort
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you know all these reasons that they minimize
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the impact so how have you approached that impact?
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gone in both directions. I have not spoken to
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my accomplishments and then no one knew what
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I was doing. I have oversold my accomplishments.
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And then I was told I need to play for the team
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on the front of the jersey, not the back. So
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like, but I truly believe that you have to speak
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to your accomplishments. Like you have to find
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these opportunities to share like what you did
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and what your contribution was because your rating
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and how your view within the organization is
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not within the team scope. Like everyone is rated
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individually. And so if everything you do is,
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oh, that was because of the team, then what's
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your contribution? So you have to be strategically
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speaking to your... impact. I think this is so
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important and it's going to feel so cringe when
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you do it and you're just going to be like, why
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did I do that? I don't want people to be like,
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this is about me, me, me, especially when you're
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a manager too. It's like, when do you find those
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opportunities to speak to your work and your
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contribution when you're always trying to toot
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the horn of your team, but it's totally necessary.
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And one of the things that I don't think people
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understand is that sure, you speaking to your
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accomplishments, Maybe you feel like, oh, this
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is making my manager look bad or my manager already
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knows what I do. Why do I need to actually share
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more broadly? I say, don't let your manager get
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in the way of your career because maybe that
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information is staying with your manager. But
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the people in those calibrations are much higher
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than your manager and they have no idea who you
00:12:18.179 --> 00:12:21.169
are. If you can find those opportunities for
00:12:21.169 --> 00:12:23.610
you to actually speak to it like, oh, yeah, I
00:12:23.610 --> 00:12:27.149
had this idea. My team carried it. We contributed
00:12:27.149 --> 00:12:29.830
to the organization this way. You have to do
00:12:29.830 --> 00:12:32.049
it. You have to get comfortable with speaking
00:12:32.049 --> 00:12:35.110
to your own accomplishments. I love that. And
00:12:35.110 --> 00:12:37.850
especially what if your manager's not respected?
00:12:39.090 --> 00:12:42.629
That's one of my hard truths that I said. If
00:12:42.629 --> 00:12:45.730
your manager is not respected within the organization,
00:12:45.990 --> 00:12:49.210
if no one is listening to what your manager has
00:12:49.210 --> 00:12:51.730
to say, you're not getting promoted. Because
00:12:51.730 --> 00:12:54.309
if they go into a calibration and they're like,
00:12:54.309 --> 00:12:57.570
oh, this person is amazing, no one's listening
00:12:57.570 --> 00:13:01.149
to them. No one cares. And so sometimes we do
00:13:01.149 --> 00:13:03.789
get stuck under managers who are not respected
00:13:03.789 --> 00:13:05.529
within the organization. I think this is also
00:13:05.529 --> 00:13:07.389
a part of playing the game. You have to know
00:13:07.389 --> 00:13:09.110
you're in those rooms. If you're in meetings
00:13:09.110 --> 00:13:12.529
with your manager, read the room, look at body
00:13:12.529 --> 00:13:14.850
language when your manager talks. It can kind
00:13:14.850 --> 00:13:17.629
of help you to understand, is this person respected?
00:13:18.110 --> 00:13:21.269
And if they are not, this is going to be a hindrance
00:13:21.269 --> 00:13:24.990
to my career. So how do I drive visibility for
00:13:24.990 --> 00:13:28.710
myself and my impact outside of my direct line
00:13:28.710 --> 00:13:31.889
of reporting structure? That is so important.
00:13:31.950 --> 00:13:34.590
And I learned that early on in my career. I had
00:13:34.590 --> 00:13:37.809
a boss that people didn't respect and she liked
00:13:37.809 --> 00:13:39.659
me. you know, she would say good things about
00:13:39.659 --> 00:13:43.240
me, but she wasn't respected. And I certainly
00:13:43.240 --> 00:13:45.080
realized, even if she was saying my name in a
00:13:45.080 --> 00:13:48.220
room, nobody cared. Nobody cared because they
00:13:48.220 --> 00:13:50.360
didn't respect her. So, you know, I strategically
00:13:50.360 --> 00:13:53.500
had to be intentional about building relationships
00:13:53.500 --> 00:13:57.179
and not excluding her, but around her, to her
00:13:57.179 --> 00:13:59.279
peers, to people who would also be in that room
00:13:59.279 --> 00:14:01.080
who would be like, oh, wait, yeah, Betsy, yeah,
00:14:01.100 --> 00:14:05.000
she's great. So it was not... being malicious
00:14:05.000 --> 00:14:06.940
or doing anything to her, it was just building
00:14:06.940 --> 00:14:09.899
around her. And that absolutely impacted my career
00:14:09.899 --> 00:14:12.820
early on because otherwise I might, well, I wouldn't
00:14:12.820 --> 00:14:15.639
still be there, but it would have been a whole
00:14:15.639 --> 00:14:18.539
different path for sure. So that's really important.
00:14:18.580 --> 00:14:19.960
That kind of leads me to something else that
00:14:19.960 --> 00:14:22.159
you talk about is that no one's coming to save
00:14:22.159 --> 00:14:26.200
you. So talk to me about that. Yes, I feel like
00:14:26.200 --> 00:14:30.139
this is the most important thing to realize about
00:14:30.139 --> 00:14:33.620
your career. Of course, there are You meet people
00:14:33.620 --> 00:14:37.379
in your career journey that can help you to get
00:14:37.379 --> 00:14:39.940
to the next level or help you to get to different
00:14:39.940 --> 00:14:42.759
spots in your career. But honestly, it is on
00:14:42.759 --> 00:14:45.960
you to own it. Your career is your responsibility.
00:14:46.580 --> 00:14:48.980
And I think that this is one of the most important
00:14:48.980 --> 00:14:51.240
lessons we can learn early on in our career.
00:14:51.940 --> 00:14:55.000
It's not your manager's. job to advocate for
00:14:55.000 --> 00:14:58.860
you. They should, but it's not necessarily their
00:14:58.860 --> 00:15:00.200
their their responsibility because they're also
00:15:00.200 --> 00:15:01.980
playing the game. They're they're trying to advocate
00:15:01.980 --> 00:15:05.860
for themselves. So you have to really own your
00:15:05.860 --> 00:15:08.659
career. And what that looks like for you is could
00:15:08.659 --> 00:15:10.340
be totally different from someone else. One of
00:15:10.340 --> 00:15:12.799
the things I always say is that a career is personal.
00:15:12.860 --> 00:15:16.000
And so there have been different times in my
00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:18.500
career where people were like, why are you why
00:15:18.500 --> 00:15:20.080
are you already leaving this company? And I'm
00:15:20.080 --> 00:15:24.370
like, Well, I am trying to get here and I've
00:15:24.370 --> 00:15:27.429
exhausted all of my resources and opportunities
00:15:27.429 --> 00:15:32.590
here, so I have to make a move. Whether it be
00:15:32.590 --> 00:15:36.889
financial or whatever your goals are, you are
00:15:36.889 --> 00:15:39.590
in control. You have to sit in the driver's seat
00:15:39.590 --> 00:15:41.610
of your career because if you don't, someone
00:15:41.610 --> 00:15:44.289
else is going to do that for you and you might
00:15:44.289 --> 00:15:47.129
end up somewhere where you did not want to be.
00:15:48.289 --> 00:15:51.539
That's so true. We talk a lot about sponsors
00:15:51.539 --> 00:15:54.100
and mentors and who's in your circle. And that's
00:15:54.100 --> 00:15:56.960
all really important, but you're not accountable
00:15:56.960 --> 00:16:00.399
for you moving on in your career. And you have
00:16:00.399 --> 00:16:01.940
to have that initiative. And I think that's a
00:16:01.940 --> 00:16:04.179
really important piece to clarify that, yes,
00:16:04.279 --> 00:16:06.799
build your circle, have the mentors, have the
00:16:06.799 --> 00:16:09.659
right people in your circle, but it's you taking
00:16:09.659 --> 00:16:11.940
the responsibility and that responsibility to
00:16:11.940 --> 00:16:13.700
do that. So if someone hears that and they're
00:16:13.700 --> 00:16:15.840
like, oh, you don't need to do that. What does
00:16:15.840 --> 00:16:17.320
that look like? How do we take some of those
00:16:17.320 --> 00:16:20.389
steps? Yeah, I think the one one thing that I
00:16:20.389 --> 00:16:22.110
always did with my teams and actually something
00:16:22.110 --> 00:16:24.330
that I had and I've talked about this in content
00:16:24.330 --> 00:16:27.789
was I always maintain this career compass for
00:16:27.789 --> 00:16:30.809
myself. I'm like, OK, so where do I actually
00:16:30.809 --> 00:16:32.649
want to be in three years? Where do I want to
00:16:32.649 --> 00:16:36.389
be in five years? What skills do I need to get
00:16:36.389 --> 00:16:37.970
there? What are my strengths? What are my weaknesses?
00:16:38.149 --> 00:16:42.259
I think being self aware of. your skills and
00:16:42.259 --> 00:16:44.620
ability also helps. Like being really real with
00:16:44.620 --> 00:16:46.820
yourself. Earlier in my career, I'm like, I'm
00:16:46.820 --> 00:16:49.799
amazing. I don't understand why I'm not getting
00:16:49.799 --> 00:16:51.879
promoted. But then it's like when an executive
00:16:51.879 --> 00:16:53.759
or somebody would walk past me, I would freeze
00:16:53.759 --> 00:16:58.019
and I wouldn't talk to them. So it's like there,
00:16:58.019 --> 00:17:00.879
I needed to, there was an opportunity for me
00:17:00.879 --> 00:17:05.269
to... to grow in my soft skill development and
00:17:05.269 --> 00:17:07.470
all of these things. And so I do think that you
00:17:07.470 --> 00:17:10.230
should have this sort of roadmap for yourself
00:17:10.230 --> 00:17:15.190
and be mindful of that. So like some, a real
00:17:15.190 --> 00:17:19.210
example of that is I had this goal that, okay,
00:17:19.289 --> 00:17:24.089
I want to be at a senior manager level by this
00:17:24.089 --> 00:17:29.009
timeframe. Titles aren't everything, but it was
00:17:29.009 --> 00:17:31.450
something that I really wanted, and I had been
00:17:31.450 --> 00:17:33.670
a manager for a really long time. I was trying
00:17:33.670 --> 00:17:37.109
to grow, and I was being told by my manager,
00:17:37.490 --> 00:17:39.750
like, you need to spend two more years in this
00:17:39.750 --> 00:17:41.529
role. And I'm like, well, I don't have two years,
00:17:41.609 --> 00:17:44.289
because I don't want to be in this role for two
00:17:44.289 --> 00:17:48.170
more years. That's a long time. Yeah, so I just
00:17:48.170 --> 00:17:52.150
took, I promoted myself on out of that organization.
00:17:52.309 --> 00:17:55.599
And I think those are those things. even if you
00:17:55.599 --> 00:17:59.640
have mentors and sponsors, they might be telling
00:17:59.640 --> 00:18:01.880
you something that is in conflict with where
00:18:01.880 --> 00:18:06.299
you're trying to go. And just because someone
00:18:06.299 --> 00:18:08.700
has been around the block for much longer than
00:18:08.700 --> 00:18:13.039
you does not necessarily mean that their advice
00:18:13.039 --> 00:18:16.680
is viable. You need to do what's best for yourself
00:18:16.680 --> 00:18:20.660
and your goals and achievements. And so that's
00:18:20.660 --> 00:18:22.759
what I, I just think you have to have this roadmap
00:18:22.759 --> 00:18:27.910
for your career and really think about how you
00:18:27.910 --> 00:18:31.470
can get there. And I just feel like that will
00:18:31.470 --> 00:18:35.210
help you as you carry on with your journey. Absolutely.
00:18:35.589 --> 00:18:38.210
And I totally agree with that. It's not funny.
00:18:38.349 --> 00:18:40.069
It's not the word to use, but it's interesting
00:18:40.069 --> 00:18:42.950
that the most popular episodes that we have done
00:18:42.950 --> 00:18:45.630
on this podcast over the last year are about
00:18:45.630 --> 00:18:47.869
the bad bosses. It's the micromanager, it's the
00:18:47.869 --> 00:18:49.890
narcissist. It's, you know, there's 13 types
00:18:49.890 --> 00:18:53.269
of bad bosses. So obviously a lot of women out
00:18:53.269 --> 00:18:55.640
there are dealing with bad bosses, right? Clearly,
00:18:55.839 --> 00:18:57.740
unfortunately, that's life. You're going to have
00:18:57.740 --> 00:18:59.099
some great ones, you're going to have some that
00:18:59.099 --> 00:19:02.000
aren't. So when you're in that situation, how
00:19:02.000 --> 00:19:04.700
do we navigate around that? How do we deal with
00:19:04.700 --> 00:19:06.660
that? And to your point, have that compass that
00:19:06.660 --> 00:19:09.079
we're focused on our career and kind of like
00:19:09.079 --> 00:19:11.240
the end and not even the end of what's next,
00:19:11.359 --> 00:19:14.599
I guess. So one of the things that I always say
00:19:14.599 --> 00:19:18.480
is that you can't outwork a bad boss. And honestly,
00:19:19.160 --> 00:19:21.849
I earlier in my career and actually later in
00:19:21.849 --> 00:19:25.190
my career too, where I would have a insecure
00:19:25.190 --> 00:19:30.289
boss or just a terrible manager, I always felt
00:19:30.289 --> 00:19:33.849
like whether I worked with them, worked harder,
00:19:34.190 --> 00:19:36.450
tried to work around them, work harder so other
00:19:36.450 --> 00:19:40.269
people can know what I was doing, it's exhausting.
00:19:40.650 --> 00:19:45.559
And it's a game that... it's very hard to win.
00:19:46.140 --> 00:19:50.720
And a lot of times you either have to move to
00:19:50.720 --> 00:19:53.180
another role or you need to move to another company
00:19:53.180 --> 00:19:58.319
because it will impact every aspect of your life,
00:19:58.460 --> 00:20:01.880
your home life, your mental health, your physical
00:20:01.880 --> 00:20:06.500
health, everything. And I just feel like life
00:20:06.500 --> 00:20:10.059
is too short to sit in that level of misery.
00:20:10.859 --> 00:20:13.839
it's just hard to outwork them. And so I just
00:20:13.839 --> 00:20:16.019
think keeping that in mind and focusing on what
00:20:16.019 --> 00:20:20.519
you can control and also just Focusing on your
00:20:20.519 --> 00:20:23.099
life outside of work definitely helps. When I
00:20:23.099 --> 00:20:26.160
was going through those situations, I started
00:20:26.160 --> 00:20:29.880
to enrich my life outside of work. I started
00:20:29.880 --> 00:20:33.559
to take on more hobbies. There was one time where
00:20:33.559 --> 00:20:35.319
I was like, I learned how to swim. I learned
00:20:35.319 --> 00:20:37.900
how to play golf. It was all because I had a
00:20:37.900 --> 00:20:40.279
shitty manager and I needed to figure out a way
00:20:40.279 --> 00:20:43.279
to clock out from that job and clock into my
00:20:43.279 --> 00:20:47.730
life. That gave me a lot more joy. so that I
00:20:47.730 --> 00:20:50.450
didn't feel like I'm sitting in this misery on
00:20:50.450 --> 00:20:53.029
my computer all day and I'm so afraid of what
00:20:53.029 --> 00:20:55.109
they're going to say or what's going to happen
00:20:55.109 --> 00:20:58.289
next. Like you literally just have to figure
00:20:58.289 --> 00:21:02.049
out how to leave it at work and start enjoying
00:21:02.049 --> 00:21:04.710
your life outside of work. That is a great point.
00:21:04.769 --> 00:21:07.210
Sometimes we just get sucked into this area of
00:21:07.210 --> 00:21:09.250
negativity and you get it, you spend a lot of
00:21:09.250 --> 00:21:12.150
hours of your day, of your week in that environment.
00:21:12.569 --> 00:21:15.170
So having something else to focus on that's positive
00:21:15.170 --> 00:21:17.869
and more optimistic is really important. I want
00:21:17.869 --> 00:21:19.950
to know, you worked at a lot of different companies
00:21:19.950 --> 00:21:22.750
and what I almost called this podcast originally
00:21:22.750 --> 00:21:25.690
was there is no girls club. Because through my
00:21:25.690 --> 00:21:29.609
career, I never found, I guess let me back up,
00:21:29.690 --> 00:21:31.470
everybody talks with the boys club, right? Where
00:21:31.470 --> 00:21:33.980
is the boys club? 100 % it exists. Great. Good
00:21:33.980 --> 00:21:36.380
for them. They actually support each other. Maybe
00:21:36.380 --> 00:21:38.779
they feel like we feel like we're excluded at
00:21:38.779 --> 00:21:40.579
times, but they're supporting each other. But
00:21:40.579 --> 00:21:43.000
what I run into is that there's a lack of that
00:21:43.000 --> 00:21:45.359
community and support amongst women throughout
00:21:45.359 --> 00:21:47.559
organizations. So have you seen that? Have you
00:21:47.559 --> 00:21:49.079
dealt with that? And like, what's your advice
00:21:49.079 --> 00:21:52.259
for navigating that? Yeah, I truly believe that.
00:21:52.259 --> 00:21:55.720
I truly believe there is no girls club. I've
00:21:55.720 --> 00:22:01.180
had situations where I there are a few girls.
00:22:01.579 --> 00:22:06.160
were against me at work for various reasons.
00:22:06.660 --> 00:22:09.519
And I'm like, at the end of the day, the competition
00:22:09.519 --> 00:22:14.039
is never between us. It just isn't. So the fact
00:22:14.039 --> 00:22:19.779
that you're going at me does not elevate you
00:22:19.779 --> 00:22:24.500
in any way. There's still more men in this organization
00:22:24.500 --> 00:22:27.579
than there will ever be us. So we should be able
00:22:27.579 --> 00:22:29.619
to bond together. But yeah, there's definitely
00:22:29.619 --> 00:22:33.759
not a girl's... club within the office. There
00:22:33.759 --> 00:22:36.299
have been pockets though. So I've worked with
00:22:36.299 --> 00:22:40.500
some amazing women in my career, many of them
00:22:40.500 --> 00:22:43.940
that I just still talk to today. So if you do
00:22:43.940 --> 00:22:46.619
find those pockets, it's like lean in, like I'm
00:22:46.619 --> 00:22:50.410
going to be. a resource for you and I want I
00:22:50.410 --> 00:22:53.509
hope that you're a resource for me. Trauma bonding
00:22:53.509 --> 00:22:56.109
is a real thing within the organization. So when
00:22:56.109 --> 00:22:59.190
you find someone who gets it and that that cares
00:22:59.190 --> 00:23:02.130
about you as an individual, like it is so important
00:23:02.130 --> 00:23:06.250
to just hold on to that. And I just know that.
00:23:06.539 --> 00:23:09.599
This this won't be forever like you working in
00:23:09.599 --> 00:23:11.519
that organization won't be forever I worked at
00:23:11.519 --> 00:23:13.880
many companies throughout throughout my my life
00:23:13.880 --> 00:23:16.859
and I was trying not to get sucked into the drama
00:23:16.859 --> 00:23:20.079
of what it is or what the organization was because
00:23:20.079 --> 00:23:22.880
I just knew it was just like a moment moment
00:23:22.880 --> 00:23:26.400
in time and I actually one of my Content pieces
00:23:26.400 --> 00:23:29.519
I talked about it is like Mean Girls has never
00:23:29.519 --> 00:23:32.460
been cute in any phase of life not in middle
00:23:32.460 --> 00:23:36.259
school high school college corporate, which is
00:23:36.259 --> 00:23:38.900
still happens, but it's like, it's just not okay.
00:23:39.500 --> 00:23:43.720
I totally agree. As you're asking me, and I say
00:23:43.720 --> 00:23:45.720
this to my teenage daughters too, sometimes you
00:23:45.720 --> 00:23:47.640
have to drown out the noise, right? Like there's
00:23:47.640 --> 00:23:49.000
going to be people who are that way. They're
00:23:49.000 --> 00:23:51.480
miserable. They have their own issues. We're
00:23:51.480 --> 00:23:53.720
never going to change them. But it's just your
00:23:53.720 --> 00:23:55.619
point, finding the people that you surround yourself
00:23:55.619 --> 00:23:58.180
with have that circle and just ignore them. People
00:23:58.180 --> 00:24:00.299
catch on. They know that they're mean. They know
00:24:00.299 --> 00:24:03.970
whatever it is. It's just focusing on those who
00:24:03.970 --> 00:24:05.549
are around you and who are supporting you and
00:24:05.549 --> 00:24:09.109
know that they're true colors though, and that's
00:24:09.109 --> 00:24:10.670
what it is. But you're right. There's a lot of
00:24:10.670 --> 00:24:12.390
amazing women out there. We just need to continue
00:24:12.390 --> 00:24:14.970
to build that and be intentional about that and
00:24:14.970 --> 00:24:17.910
just not only ignore them, but draw out their
00:24:17.910 --> 00:24:20.670
voices and the noise with positivity and the
00:24:20.670 --> 00:24:23.690
support. So I totally agree with that. So you
00:24:23.690 --> 00:24:27.069
talk a lot about major life upgrades. Talk to
00:24:27.069 --> 00:24:29.990
me about some of the biggest major life upgrades
00:24:29.990 --> 00:24:35.279
that you support. Yeah, so I, one of the major
00:24:35.279 --> 00:24:39.099
life upgrades that has happened for me was one,
00:24:39.259 --> 00:24:42.180
deciding how much of my time I'm willing to exchange
00:24:42.180 --> 00:24:45.680
for money. I think that that has been one of
00:24:45.680 --> 00:24:48.160
those things that has completely changed my life.
00:24:48.359 --> 00:24:51.980
I think also figuring out how to create my own
00:24:51.980 --> 00:24:55.279
opportunities has been another one of those because
00:24:55.279 --> 00:24:58.960
I, for so long, when I was miserable in a job
00:24:58.960 --> 00:25:03.380
or had a reporting structure that wasn't ideal
00:25:03.380 --> 00:25:06.359
and bad bosses, all that kind of stuff. I just
00:25:06.359 --> 00:25:10.380
felt stuck and like it's either this or I'm unemployed
00:25:10.380 --> 00:25:13.960
and I don't know what I would do if I'm unemployed.
00:25:14.839 --> 00:25:18.039
So creating my own opportunities has been another
00:25:18.039 --> 00:25:21.500
one of those. And I just also feel like finding
00:25:21.500 --> 00:25:26.339
things that I love outside of work that makes
00:25:26.339 --> 00:25:30.109
me feel more whole has been completely life -changing
00:25:30.109 --> 00:25:32.950
for me. That is like the hobbies that I've started
00:25:32.950 --> 00:25:36.150
to do that is getting more involved in my community.
00:25:36.450 --> 00:25:39.250
I've never done that, honestly, because when
00:25:39.250 --> 00:25:41.250
I worked in an office, it was like, get off,
00:25:41.289 --> 00:25:43.809
go home, dinner, get ready for bed, go to work
00:25:43.809 --> 00:25:46.170
the next day. And then working from home, I'm
00:25:46.170 --> 00:25:48.309
like on my computer pretty much all day long.
00:25:48.329 --> 00:25:51.049
So I wasn't really leaning into finding community
00:25:51.049 --> 00:25:55.170
outside of work. But I've done that now and it
00:25:55.170 --> 00:25:58.230
has just enriched my life greatly. very thankful
00:25:58.230 --> 00:26:01.410
for those life upgrades. That's a great one.
00:26:01.809 --> 00:26:03.930
And you kind of hide into this a little bit,
00:26:04.369 --> 00:26:06.430
but you talk about building something that's
00:26:06.430 --> 00:26:09.089
yours and you've done that, right? You went from
00:26:09.089 --> 00:26:12.130
your corporate big companies to doing your own
00:26:12.130 --> 00:26:15.230
thing. So how did you get the courage to do that?
00:26:15.269 --> 00:26:17.150
And what has that process looked like for you?
00:26:18.000 --> 00:26:20.579
So I started building it while I was working
00:26:20.579 --> 00:26:23.119
in corporate. I think that that helped mitigate
00:26:23.119 --> 00:26:25.059
the risk because I'm like, it didn't work, then
00:26:25.059 --> 00:26:29.180
I still have my job. But once it started to become
00:26:29.180 --> 00:26:31.680
sustainable, like I passed my corporate income
00:26:31.680 --> 00:26:35.039
multiple years, I'm like, okay, this is sustainable
00:26:35.039 --> 00:26:38.940
enough where I have a little runway. And so maybe
00:26:38.940 --> 00:26:41.599
I can clock out, I can take a sabbatical and
00:26:41.599 --> 00:26:45.400
just see what this. could become and it has been
00:26:45.400 --> 00:26:47.859
amazing. So I quit corporate in August of last
00:26:47.859 --> 00:26:51.380
year. Literally changed my life. My life has
00:26:51.380 --> 00:26:54.900
been so much better since I was able to just
00:26:54.900 --> 00:26:58.019
go off on my own and do my do my own thing. And
00:26:58.019 --> 00:27:00.019
the way that I mitigated risk too is because
00:27:00.019 --> 00:27:02.940
I'm risk averse is I went I went part time working
00:27:02.940 --> 00:27:06.140
in corporate and that was life changing. I'm
00:27:06.140 --> 00:27:08.660
like 20 hours a week. Now I got this other time
00:27:08.660 --> 00:27:11.599
to focus on my business. Instead of having two
00:27:11.599 --> 00:27:14.900
full time jobs pretty much. It was it was amazing.
00:27:15.180 --> 00:27:17.680
And yeah, I'm just so grateful. So when I started
00:27:17.680 --> 00:27:21.980
my LLC, I've been I do content creation. I work
00:27:21.980 --> 00:27:25.900
with a lot of amazing brands. I travel and and
00:27:25.900 --> 00:27:27.819
partnering with these brands, brands that I never
00:27:27.819 --> 00:27:31.079
thought I would ever work with, like your IBM,
00:27:31.460 --> 00:27:34.279
Amazon, Anthropic. Those are just like the more
00:27:34.279 --> 00:27:36.460
in the technical space, but also like brands
00:27:36.460 --> 00:27:41.109
like Lazy Boy. Just absolutely. life -changing
00:27:41.109 --> 00:27:43.150
I never thought I'd be able to do that, but I
00:27:43.150 --> 00:27:47.650
think it I can attribute it to just going for
00:27:47.650 --> 00:27:50.910
it and and being consistent and even when I didn't
00:27:50.910 --> 00:27:53.890
know how it would turn out because Everybody
00:27:53.890 --> 00:27:56.589
starts at zero you start like for content creation.
00:27:56.589 --> 00:27:58.809
You started zero followers. You start with not
00:27:58.809 --> 00:28:02.329
knowing what you're doing and Consistency is
00:28:02.329 --> 00:28:05.009
like definitely how you win the game and I just
00:28:05.009 --> 00:28:07.490
was consistent with it and it just it just paid
00:28:07.490 --> 00:28:10.579
off Which is amazing. And you talked about having
00:28:10.579 --> 00:28:13.319
like your compass and sort of your plan. So was
00:28:13.319 --> 00:28:16.440
this on your plan five years ago? No, this was
00:28:16.440 --> 00:28:20.599
not on my bingo card at all. But I do feel like
00:28:20.599 --> 00:28:22.539
when you're in these, when you're in like really
00:28:22.539 --> 00:28:25.220
difficult situations, like you can sit in it
00:28:25.220 --> 00:28:27.220
or you can figure out a way out. And that's what
00:28:27.220 --> 00:28:30.359
I did. And so I actually talked about on my sub
00:28:30.359 --> 00:28:34.049
stack recently. was I wrote this note to myself.
00:28:34.190 --> 00:28:36.269
It's like 3 a .m. I was clearly having a terrible
00:28:36.269 --> 00:28:39.289
day at work. I think it was 2024, it was October
00:28:39.289 --> 00:28:43.789
2024. I was like, in six months, I need to be
00:28:43.789 --> 00:28:46.069
financially stable enough to quit corporate America.
00:28:46.230 --> 00:28:50.509
I wrote it down and I just figured out a way
00:28:50.509 --> 00:28:52.490
to make it happen. I think if you believe that
00:28:52.490 --> 00:28:54.910
it can happen for you, it literally can happen
00:28:54.910 --> 00:28:58.269
for you because what happens is you start to
00:28:58.269 --> 00:29:01.140
think about Okay, let me try this. So what about
00:29:01.140 --> 00:29:03.319
this? I just think it changes your mindset. And
00:29:03.319 --> 00:29:06.279
I think that's what happened for me is it completely
00:29:06.279 --> 00:29:10.240
rewired my mindset to figuring out like how to
00:29:10.240 --> 00:29:13.759
make this actually work for me. And it did. So
00:29:13.759 --> 00:29:15.019
as you were going through that, you made your
00:29:15.019 --> 00:29:16.619
decision, right? You started making progress.
00:29:16.859 --> 00:29:19.039
Were you ever like, wait, maybe I should stop.
00:29:19.099 --> 00:29:21.180
Maybe I should go back and get to that consistent
00:29:21.180 --> 00:29:22.700
paycheck. Like, did you ever have those moments
00:29:22.700 --> 00:29:25.240
of doubt? Oh, yeah, definitely. So there was
00:29:25.240 --> 00:29:27.539
many times where I felt like, oh, I'm going to
00:29:27.539 --> 00:29:31.900
quit. And I didn't. But something good would
00:29:31.900 --> 00:29:33.579
happen afterwards. So, for example, when I was
00:29:33.579 --> 00:29:35.980
going to quit the first time, I was like, no,
00:29:36.180 --> 00:29:38.559
I'm not ready. I'm not going to do this. And
00:29:38.559 --> 00:29:41.680
the next day I had gotten the biggest partnership
00:29:41.680 --> 00:29:46.440
that I had ever had. I'm like, everything was
00:29:46.440 --> 00:29:48.920
telling me that I should do it. I remember when
00:29:48.920 --> 00:29:53.099
I another time I was going to quit. I didn't.
00:29:53.480 --> 00:29:57.460
And that month I got, I had made like six figures
00:29:57.460 --> 00:30:00.599
in brand partnerships and I was traveling, I
00:30:00.599 --> 00:30:03.160
was balancing on them. Like again, like you could
00:30:03.160 --> 00:30:06.299
have taken this next step and bet on yourself.
00:30:06.400 --> 00:30:08.680
But again, like I said, I'm risk averse and people
00:30:08.680 --> 00:30:11.359
that just like, oh, I don't know what's going
00:30:11.359 --> 00:30:13.339
to happen, but I'm about to quit and figure it
00:30:13.339 --> 00:30:19.900
out. That is not me at all. I cannot, I'm just
00:30:19.900 --> 00:30:22.319
like, I try to tiptoe and then I'm like, oh,
00:30:22.319 --> 00:30:25.660
let me backtrack. But yeah, there was many times
00:30:25.660 --> 00:30:28.859
where I wanted to, but then didn't. And then
00:30:28.859 --> 00:30:31.240
finally, I think going part -time really helped
00:30:31.240 --> 00:30:34.519
me to see that, okay, I can do this. And if I
00:30:34.519 --> 00:30:38.140
did the, yeah, ease into it, exactly. That was
00:30:38.140 --> 00:30:41.019
how I was able to do it. And never mind that
00:30:41.019 --> 00:30:43.099
you didn't also mention that you also have a
00:30:43.099 --> 00:30:46.380
baby, like a new -ish baby, right? And that just
00:30:46.380 --> 00:30:48.339
adds to the pressure. And they're like, oh my
00:30:48.339 --> 00:30:50.160
gosh, you have to be a responsible mom on all
00:30:50.160 --> 00:30:53.160
those pieces. Oh my god, yeah. And it's kind
00:30:53.160 --> 00:30:56.380
of wild because, again, I feel like every time
00:30:56.380 --> 00:31:00.200
I thought about leaving, something big would
00:31:00.200 --> 00:31:03.599
happen. And what happened, like I quit in August.
00:31:03.900 --> 00:31:07.400
We adopted our baby girl. I quit in August. And
00:31:07.400 --> 00:31:12.759
then we find out. about this adoption case and
00:31:12.759 --> 00:31:15.319
she was born really early. And so I was having
00:31:15.319 --> 00:31:19.640
to travel back and forth to where she was. And
00:31:19.640 --> 00:31:22.470
I'm like, if I hadn't have quit. Of course, I
00:31:22.470 --> 00:31:24.269
didn't know this was going to happen. But if
00:31:24.269 --> 00:31:26.769
I had not quit my job, we wouldn't have been
00:31:26.769 --> 00:31:29.329
able to do that. I wouldn't have had the time
00:31:29.329 --> 00:31:31.910
to do that. So I think everything happens for
00:31:31.910 --> 00:31:36.549
a reason. And just listening to your gut, it
00:31:36.549 --> 00:31:39.609
always helps you to make the right decision.
00:31:39.650 --> 00:31:41.950
And I'm just so thankful it all worked out. And
00:31:41.950 --> 00:31:43.670
now I get to be more present for my baby. We
00:31:43.670 --> 00:31:46.930
have this newborn. And I still have multiple
00:31:46.930 --> 00:31:50.730
businesses. And it's just really. Nice to be
00:31:50.730 --> 00:31:53.609
more present for for the family that we're growing.
00:31:54.089 --> 00:31:56.869
Oh, I love that. I'm so happy for you. And, you
00:31:56.869 --> 00:31:58.309
know, you put in the hard work, you've done all
00:31:58.309 --> 00:32:00.190
the right things. You had the plan. The plan
00:32:00.190 --> 00:32:02.230
sometimes goes a different way. But here's your
00:32:02.230 --> 00:32:04.369
point. I feel that way, too. Like things work
00:32:04.369 --> 00:32:07.049
out for a reason. And sometimes you don't see
00:32:07.049 --> 00:32:09.630
it right initially. And you're like, oh, OK,
00:32:09.789 --> 00:32:11.569
actually, this is really great. This was great
00:32:11.569 --> 00:32:14.150
timing. So, you know, I think that's really important
00:32:14.150 --> 00:32:16.569
is let's all have a plan. Let's all work really
00:32:16.569 --> 00:32:18.519
hard. work on the visibility, but at the end
00:32:18.519 --> 00:32:21.059
of the day, sometimes things just have a different
00:32:21.059 --> 00:32:23.000
path than what we anticipated for. So it's being
00:32:23.000 --> 00:32:26.240
able to pivot and not be completely risk averse.
00:32:26.460 --> 00:32:29.240
So I'm glad you took that risk. Yeah. Yeah. And
00:32:29.240 --> 00:32:30.920
I think it's also starting before you're ready
00:32:30.920 --> 00:32:32.940
because a lot of times, like to your point, we
00:32:32.940 --> 00:32:36.940
do all have a plan, whether it be like, oh, I
00:32:36.940 --> 00:32:39.079
have this corporate job and it's stable, it's
00:32:39.079 --> 00:32:43.119
a stable paycheck. At the same time, you still
00:32:43.119 --> 00:32:46.130
have to be mindful of like, okay, What if this
00:32:46.130 --> 00:32:47.809
happened? Like what's worst case, what's best
00:32:47.809 --> 00:32:52.690
case? And I do feel like creating something that
00:32:52.690 --> 00:32:55.450
it's kind of like a plan B is definitely the
00:32:55.450 --> 00:32:58.190
way to go in this environment that we're in.
00:32:58.650 --> 00:33:00.309
Very true. Especially this environment that we're
00:33:00.309 --> 00:33:03.789
in. It's a little crazy. Well, Roxy, thank you
00:33:03.789 --> 00:33:06.029
so much for being here and sharing your hard
00:33:06.029 --> 00:33:07.710
truths. I love them. If people want to connect
00:33:07.710 --> 00:33:09.529
with you, here's the best place to find you.
00:33:09.960 --> 00:33:12.039
Yeah. So if you want to connect with me, I'm
00:33:12.039 --> 00:33:15.400
on Instagram, I'm on TikTok, it's at Roxy Cows.
00:33:15.480 --> 00:33:18.480
I'm also on threads, Roxy Cows and YouTube, and
00:33:18.480 --> 00:33:21.960
then LinkedIn as well, Roxy Cows. Awesome. And
00:33:21.960 --> 00:33:23.680
we'll link to all of that in the show notes as
00:33:23.680 --> 00:33:26.519
well. So thank you, Roxy, and best of luck. Thank
00:33:26.519 --> 00:33:28.599
you so much. And thanks for having me. I love
00:33:28.599 --> 00:33:30.619
this conversation with Roxy because it was such
00:33:30.619 --> 00:33:32.559
a good reminder that being great at your job
00:33:32.559 --> 00:33:35.549
is not enough. You have to be visible. You have
00:33:35.549 --> 00:33:37.950
to speak to your impact. You have to understand
00:33:37.950 --> 00:33:40.410
the game you're playing, even if you wish there
00:33:40.410 --> 00:33:42.990
wasn't a game. And maybe the biggest takeaway,
00:33:43.250 --> 00:33:45.329
your career is personal, and no one is coming
00:33:45.329 --> 00:33:48.450
to save it for you. Roxy said it so clearly.
00:33:48.769 --> 00:33:50.869
If you don't sit in the driver's seat of your
00:33:50.869 --> 00:33:53.950
career, someone else will. And she has truly
00:33:53.950 --> 00:33:56.450
lived by these words, even when it wasn't her
00:33:56.450 --> 00:33:59.549
original career plan. We'll link Roxy's information
00:33:59.549 --> 00:34:01.849
in the show notes so you can follow her and her
00:34:01.849 --> 00:34:03.980
work. If you enjoyed this show, please share
00:34:03.980 --> 00:34:06.599
it with a friend. And as always, stay loud and
00:34:06.599 --> 00:34:07.099
stay lifted.




