Being good at your job is not the same as being recognized for your job. And for women, the “likable vs. competent” double bind is real.
In this episode, we are joined by Dr. Alison Fragale—organizational psychologist, professor at UNC Kenan-Flagler, and author of Likeable Badass—to break down the science of how women earn status, influence, and opportunities without getting shoved into the “too nice” or “too much” box.
Dr. Alison Fragale researches power, status, and influence in organizations and translates that research into practical tools for leadership, communication, and negotiation.
We cover:
*What “Likeable Badass” actually means (and why it works)
*The traps women get pushed into: warmth vs. competence
*How to self-advocate without feeling salesy
*Language shifts that raise your influence fast
*What to do when you get backlash for being direct
Chapters:
00:00 Cold open — why “just work harder” isn’t the answer
01:12 Meet Alison + what “Likeable Badass” means
03:32 The real tension: warmth + assertiveness
06:20 The “warmth trap” (when being nice makes you invisible)
09:10 The “competence trap” (when direct = “difficult”)
12:05 Status: the unsexy thing that changes everything
14:45 Self-promotion without the cringe
18:05 Negotiation: how to ask without apologizing
21:20 Influence moves: language swaps that land better
24:10 Handling backlash (and staying steady)
27:10 Leading as a Likeable Badass
30:05 Rapid-fire myths about confidence + power
33:15 Your 7-day Likeable Badass plan
34:50 Closing + where to find Alison
Links / Resources
Alison's site: https://www.alisonfragale.com/
Alison's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alisonfragale/
Buy Likeable Badass: https://amzn.to/4628vSU
Loud & Lifted Podcast: https://www.loudandliftedpodcast.com/
Sign up for L&L newsletter: https://loud-lifted.kit.com/profile/links
